Bees Stadium Statue… Or Bust

In his matchday programme column for the Preston game, Billy Reeves re-opened the debate into which, if any, Brentford legends should be immortalised at Griffin Park, or at the new stadium. My personal view is that Harry Curtis is the one man who stands head and shoulders above all others in our club’s history and, if the right artist is commissioned, statues are not as cliche as the Bees radio pundit suggests – however, I do know where he’s coming from.

Beesotted ran this in Issue 96…

The unveiling of Fulham Football Club’s Michael Jackson inspired statue not only underlined how the world of football and celebrity have now merged into one, but also of how a poorly designed piece of tat and a well coordinated publicity stunt can guarentee countless column inches in the press. So, not to be outdone, Beesotted is launching the search for Brentford’s very own tenuously-linked statue for Griffin Park.

Once we have determined Bees fans’ favourite celebrity from the choices here, we will approach the football club and request a temporary plinth to be made available in the corner of the stadium between the Ealing Road terrace, and the New Road. Yeah, over there in the corner near the floodlight pilon. We believe significant media coverage will ensue, further embarrassing our friends downstream, while we have some fun along the way.

So, who will you choose to be immortalised at Griffin Park? We will be canvassing opinions over the next few home games and the final decision will be made public.

Roger De Coursey and Nookie Bear

Roger and Nookie have made countless appearances at Brentford Sportsmans dinners, entertaining the beer-fuelled revellers, and upsetting their female guests. The duo’s post dinner cabaret is legendary, and remember, the fact they both support Crystal Palace should be irrelevant when casting your vote.

Text NOOKIE to 0821 612 61

James Whale

The outspoken radio phone-in host would be a controvertial choice it has to be said, but Whale would no doubt get fully behind our attempts to immortalise his form in bronze (but likely to be papiér mâché in all honestly). Whale’s decision was a close one however, we almost nominated Scott Mills, the annoyingly sarcastic, monotone Radio One jock instead.

Text WHALEBLUBBER to 0821 612 61

Abi Titmuss

Ms Titmuss’s statue would, clearly, provide a wonderful distraction for supporters through those dull, goalless periods during night games at Griffin Park. Subtle uplighting could also be employed to excentuate the R-list celebs assets, thus providing an artistic, yet surreal addition to an aircraft’s approach to Heathrow.

Text TITTY to 0821 612 61

Russell Grant

Grant’s support of Brentford Football Club is unquestionable and it has long been argued that the astrolloger’s amazing future-telling talents should have been better employed over the years when signing new players. Beesotted feels that an erection to be proud of would help heal old wounds between the club and the celebrity, and that Grant’s powers can be utlised by Uwe Rösler as our new manger embarks on his quest of taking The Bees back to the top flight.

Text RAMPANT to 0821 612 61

So, as you can see, there are some difficult decisions to be made by Brentford fans in the coming weeks, and we urge all Bees to give our campaign the gravitas it deserves.

Dave Lane