You’re Not Fit To Referee

“Overall I didn’t love the decisions today” was Keith Andrews’ diplomatic verdict on the performance of referee Thomas Bramall.

It definitely wasn’t what he wanted to say but the Premier League overlords have an uncanny knack of cracking down hard on free speech and opinion.

Strangely though for a multi-billion-pound brand with entertainment as its core value, they’re far less keen on cracking down on incompetence from their own match officials.

For Biggar, Dunn, Stroud – if you know, you know – read Hooper, Atwell, Madley and even the “best we have” Oliver. Household names for all the wrong reasons.

Why? Because their invariably twisted and common sense-free takes on what constitutes a foul and what doesn’t create the fine margins that dictate our weekends.

Thomas Bramall’s display where he took centre stage was exceptional though for turning a game between two good footballing sides into a dark arts free-for-all.

A strong of baffling decisions – the only two he got right were the penalty and disallowed goal – saw him vilified by both sets of fans.

In Bramall’s mind, and those of the growing ranks of arrogant officials, he’ll see that as justification of a job well done because ‘hey if they both hated me, I must have been fair’.

To be fair Bramall set his stall out early as they’re told to in ref school.

Two minutes in and the slightest touch from Kayode on Angulo’s neck is a free kick that left most in the GTech bemused. A contact sport?

Ballard’s excellent strike that followed is ruled out after a five-minute VAR check that should have taken anyone with even a basic knowledge of the rules seconds to disallow.

The scene is set. Brentford are second to every ball, The Black Cats are exhilaratingly rampant while frustration grows as the ref gives even the slightest contact as a foul.

A blatant shove in the back goes unnoticed by Bramall who is 10 yards away, a flick of the ankle sees Brobbey, a giant of a striker, crash to the floor. Bafta incoming.

It almost kicks off on the touchline as Bramall’s grasp on the reality of elite powerful athletes and their wiles becomes almost non-existent.

Fans of both sides have no idea what could happen next but are aware there’s a decent chance it will involve the hapless referee.

I’m painfully aware there are plenty of referee apologists out there who slate me every time I criticise referees (this will be my first and last pop this season as it’s too stressful).

They’re welcome to their opinion. If they think the standard of refereeing and expertise on VAR panels in this country is good, they’re more than entitled to that view.

This article and others will make no difference to the people who run the game or the Key Match Incidents panel and the Professional Game Match Officials Limited (PGMOL) officials. They have a financial interest and a brand to protect.

But when that brand is being tarnished week in, week out by poor and inconsistent referees with scant knowledge of the way professional footballers actually think – and yes, they are wily masters of the dark arts – the product suffers.

In any job you have to earn respect – it’s not a given. Make mistakes but learn from them, that’s fine. If you don’t, you should be dropped like a player. Footballers are criticised, so why shouldn’t referees be? Managers should have every right to constructively say what they think of a referee’s performance.

That being the case, I’ll hazard a guess at what Keith probably wanted to say: “Overall Bramall’s decision-making was dreadfully inconsistent and my players lost faith in him very early on. He was erratic, reluctant to engage and that affected the rhythm of what should have been a free-flowing game between two very good sides”.

It’s a shame because the standard of refereeing has been very good so far this season – I’ve barely noticed the officials. That’s how it should be.

Congratulations nonetheless to Thomas Bramall on joining the Brentford Hall of Infamy for making the Top 5 worst refereeing performances of the modern era.